Zadie

Zadie is Elis girlfriend as of July 2026.

Apparently they only converse on Snapchat o algo so both are probably cheating on each other.

Below is a transcript of Eli babbling after being brainwashed by the FAGWASHER-5000
“This was when we played at the Kennedy center this was peak times, this was absolutely peak times in perspective we were 13 and had to lock in to play and it was our first advanced concert, that was crazy. (Hardy orchestra blah blah) what’s her name? (Zoe) do you also have a brother? Cause there was a Zoe that had a brother. Oh dude look at this this is peak 6th grade lunch table when we used to just do random shit we put ham and cheese on his head… laugh this is the first time I ever has chipotle. A date in history. It was they kinda scammed me. This was when my computer got full clipped by a speaker. This is my teacher dressed in a very interesting fit. Who the help is that? I don’t know who that is. This doesn’t even exist anymore this z burger like despawned. No this is Matthew jumping off a volleyball ref stand.“

As you can see, after being brainwashed he was compelled to give many personal details for the sale of his data to Palantir remembering anniversary dates.